Thursday, June 12, 2014

"A Thank you note to Arundel" -- R. E. Mandiveyi


Dear Arundel,

I have taken it upon myself to thank you for the five years of struggle, labour and oppression that have molded me and many other students into respectable and nearly, fine “ladies.”

Our volatile relationship began when I first stepped on your lush, green grounds in the chaotic year of 2008. I, a naïve chubby eleven year old, was deceived by your excellent use of propaganda,  appropriately used for your Open Day.

Thank you Arundel, for making our lives five times quicker by limiting the different hairstyles, and choices of hair colour. Your legislation of anti- hair expression laws have benefitted in making us uniform and plain in comparison to our Chizi and Helenic counterparts. I would also like to thank you for the dull and unimaginative colour palate of our uniform. The harsh, hideous brown blazer makes a striking and sharp contrast to the slick blue of the Helenic and Peterhouse uniform. In effect, we come across as distractingly unique.

Another thing to give gratitude to is your commitment in depriving us of our cellphones during lesson time. You deprive us of the amusement and delight that a cellphone provides. This has the positive outcome of forcing students to concentrate in class, living through an agonizing lesson filled with boredom- and no Whatsapp.

Many students can be grateful for Arundel’s success in altering the diets of many individuals. The meagre amounts of food we receive at lunch has taught us to eat less than what we ought to, assisting in helping students like myself who are on a Weight Watches diet plan.

Lastly, you have succeeded in oppressing us with cart loads of work and tests after tests, forcing us to deprive ourselves of indulgencies like TV, videogames and the internet. The couch potato in us has been purged. We automatically “Woman-up,” taking it upon ourselves to do the work diligently and on time. Well, we try.

When I leave your exceptional institution, I will be grateful to know that I was transformed into a full fledged Arundel lady. At least I hope so.

Best regards

An Arundel student

R. E. Mandiveyi

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